Nobody told me, the road would be easy, and I don't believe he's brought me this far, to leave me...*

I'm at a point in my life where from the outside looking in, it would seem like I have nothing, I know nothing, I have hit rock bottom, and my life is spinning out of control. Not only am I carrying the blessing and responsibility of life, but I'm in the process of convincing the one I created it with to stay.....to be by myside. To help me face this cruel judgemental world and build the future no one believes can exist for us. I have done everything I can do to to show my love, my love. I have loved him more than anyone else in his life who has no obligation to, but chose to. I have believed in him when he didnt believe in himself, and supported his dreams more than anyone else in his life ever has. I have always stood by him, and stood up for him, in every situation even if he wasnt there to stand up for himself, or didnt feel he should. I have prayed for him more than I do for myself, and allowed my second thought of every day to be of him, no matter what happened the night before, right after I think of how lucky I am to see another sunrise. I have poured my heart to him, and I can not accept that he is not the one for me. I believe in him too much, I believe in us too much. I have seen God in more things since he came into my life than I every have before, and I will never trade that, or him, for anything else--it's not worth it.



I just want to say that I love him, and I need him. I am willing to do whatever I have to, to show this man that we are worth it, and our mission and purpose in life being carried by me right now, and inteneded to be watered to help grow by US, is worth it. I am not afraid. I am willing to go against the odds, against the doubts, against the disapproval, because something in my heart says I've finally found something thats true, and something worth fighting for.



They say the "Devil never wins unless you don't fight...." He will NEVER win as long as this relationship and Family is up to me. But I can not convince him of where he should be. They say "Love, is a lot of things. It's varied-- one thing it can NEVER be, is unsure..." So I must leave things up to him. I am taking his advice and trying to be more positive. He has hurt me more than anyone, and I'm sure I've done the same to him, but I can only focus on the love of I have for him. How much he's changed my life. How he gave me life. I just hope he can appreciate me the same way, and love me for carrying and nuturing his life in me now as well. I chose this blessing, and I chose him... and I just pray he chooses me. But I have to let him go, I must give him to God. I must get out of God's way, and I hope our love and our lives together truly were written in the stars. I believe that.... I can no longer just be stranded in my reality, for if I do i'll be angry and sad until I die. I know that there is no sin in being weary though, the sin is in giving up.......





I love you, and I pass the ball to you....

G.A.M.E. Time

(God Answers Me Everytime)